Saturday, December 28, 2013

Alright, so I've been thinking a lot, and the church not only gives a lot of responsibility to people who can't handle it,  but they give them unrealistic expectations. Like, for example, all of the women are supposed to have babies, and  lay at the feet of their husbands, and all of the husbands are supposed to be able to support the family 100% of the time. Or maybe that all of the women love to knit and soothe screaming children, and when the husbands come home, dinner is made and all of the children are lined up with shining faces. Not every  family is this way, but I have heard it from more than a few leaders in my years of being a Mormon. Im not sure why they want to "take away" , for lack of a better statement, the rights of women. Im no feminist, but I can't stand the way they push "worthy families" If there is a single mother, they want her to be out and meeting men to find someone who can help support the family. That is great, it's stressful being a single mother, I was raised by one most of my life. The problem is the fact that my mother is on her third marriage and the one she has picked as "the keeper" is a terrible father. He wasnt married until his mid-40's and has never even been engaged. He fell in love with my beautiful, energetic mother and turned her into, well, him. He says things like "when you move out, we'll get nice things." Yes, children ruin furniture and put stickers on your car windows, lets think about the fact that they are only 8, and have had enough stress in their childhood. You were supposed to be the stable in this crazy family. I feel like the LDS church split my parents up by their unrealistic expectations of a healthy, "worthy" marriage. And then they simply pushed her into getting married again to have the support she needed. I feel she should have waited until she found the right person, or the one that suited her best, but if she had that mindset, I would have never been born, so... there you go.


If you are reading this blog because you have doubts about your Mormon beliefs, let me direct you to the places that helped me make my decision:

www.reddit.com/r/exmormon

www.exmormon.org

www.iamanexmormon.com


-K.

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

From confused to happy in 3 short months.

I was talking to a friend about starting my own blog, so, here I am. My name is Kelsey and I recently left The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (the Mormon church) and became an Atheist because of the many conflicts in the church teachings, and the expectations of the members. I always thought of the members in the church as 2 groups: the people who were born into it and don't know any different, and the converts who have been tricked into thinking that the relief they are feeling from becoming sober and being financially stable (because of the word of wisdom and tithing) is because of the Holy Ghost and Jesus Christ. Of course, there are a lot of other brainwashing techniques that the church uses, but I can't name them all. I'll run out of room. But anyways... I was born into Mormonism in Utah, and my parents split up when I was very young, which I also believe has to do with the church and it's ridiculous expectations, but that's a story for another day. After the split, my mom kept all of the kids and moved back to where all of her family was, and my dad followed a job across the country. I'm now a freshman in college and my major says I'm going for Early Childhood Education, but I can honestly say I have no idea what I want to do with my life. To me, that's not a bad thing at all. I'm just figuring out who I am with this lifestyle change, and this past summer I met a person who changed my life for the better, and for privacy purposes, I'll refer to him as Jason. I met him on a website called reddit, and at first he was just one of the 20+ messages I got after I posted, so I sent him the reply I had sent to at least 10 other people (My name, and a general introduction) and we hit it off pretty well. Now, if you would have told me beforehand that this Jason guy was going to turn me away from the church teachings and into a heathen, I would have probably ran as fast and as far away as possible from him (figuratively speaking, of course.) But I stuck around, and I'm glad he didn't become one of the lost conversations in my phone because I would still be confused, depressed, and Mormon. Now I look at everything in my life in a different way, and I accept people so much better. Instead of thinking of ways to defend my religion and convert people, I think of ways to make other people happy, including myself. This marks the 3rd of many, many months of finding myself, exploring the world, and being the person I've always wanted to be.

If you are reading this blog because you have doubts about your Mormon beliefs, let me direct you to the places that helped me make my decision: 
www.reddit.com/r/exmormon
www.exmormon.org
www.iamanexmormon.com

-Kelsey